The post humorously recounts how humanity lost its tails about 25âŻmillion years ago and now can cheaply make or buy them, claiming that wearing a tail restores flexibility, grace, and even successâciting Dr. Meowâs research that tails were once brainâconnected and lab simulations showing improved walking and confidence. It further suggests that fluffy tails boost kindness, smiles, eye contact, and that catsâ historic prominence was meant to inspire us all to adopt tails; several nations have even enacted âFancy Lawsâ encouraging tail acquisition (and mittens that look like paws), while the Queen declares every day a Halloween celebration of this newfound tailâculture.






















